Read the video transcript
I saw a great video this week from Lo Bosworth talking about how she has postpartum depression and it didn't look like how she thought it would look. She thought it would look like sadness or teariness. And this is where there's such a misconception around what postpartum depression actually looks like in 2026. Because I would say often it doesn't look like sadness. Most often how moms describe it to me is like a numbness. They may say, I feel blah, or I feel nothing. And what that is, is an emotional flattening. And that is depression. So when you think about depression, it has two hallmarks. One of them is low mood, of course, like sadness, teariness, feeling hopeless. The other one is called anhedonia, which is a lack of interest in the things that you used to be interested in. So when she says, I feel flat in the video, what I hear is she doesn't feel joy out of the things that she used to get joy out of. She doesn't have the high highs that she used to have and that is depression. So if you are experiencing emotional numbness, flattening, anhedonia, or a low mood, you are not alone. Postpartum depression is really common. It's also very treatable. I have a lot of resources at the link in my bio and as always follow along for more honest conversations around motherhood and mental health.
“I feel blah.” “I feel nothing.” Those are words moms use with me when they're describing postpartum depression. They expected sadness or crying, so feeling flat doesn't look like the problem they were told to watch for.
If that's how you've been feeling, take it seriously. Numbness has several possible causes, including depression, and it's something you can bring to your doctor or a therapist in exactly those words.
Can postpartum depression feel like nothing?
Yes. Depression can involve low mood, but it can also involve losing interest or pleasure in things you used to enjoy. The clinical word for that is anhedonia. Sadness doesn't have to be the feeling you notice most.
The National Institute of Mental Health includes an “empty” mood and loss of interest or pleasure among the symptoms of perinatal depression (NIMH, 2023). Its general depression guidance explains that either depressed mood or loss of interest or pleasure can be a core symptom in a diagnosis. A clinician looks at the whole picture, including other symptoms and how long they've lasted.
In the video above, I talk about why flatness gets missed. A mom may be doing everything the baby needs, getting through the day and telling herself she's just tired. Inside, she doesn't feel like herself.
What does postpartum numbness feel like?
Sometimes good things happen and you register them without enjoying them. Your baby smiles. You know it's a big moment, and the feeling you expected doesn't arrive.
It might also look like:
- Caring for the baby feels like working through a checklist.
- You don't look forward to things you normally enjoy.
- Someone asks how you're doing and you struggle to find an answer.
- You feel distant from your partner or friends, even when they're right there.
- You feel guilty about not feeling more.
I'd want to know whether the flatness is everywhere or mainly in your connection with your baby. If other parts of life still feel enjoyable but bonding is difficult, describe that too. Bonding can take time, and difficulty bonding can also be part of a mood problem. An assessment can help you sort it out.
Could something else be contributing?
Yes. Weeks of interrupted sleep can leave you depleted. Burnout, a frightening birth and some medications can also contribute to feeling disconnected or flat. More than one may be happening at once.
If it began after a birth that frightened you, tell the clinician about that experience, even if the birth looked routine on paper. Birth trauma recovery explains some of what can follow.
If you're already taking medication and notice a change in your feelings, talk to your prescriber. Don't stop or change it on your own. It can take a conversation to understand whether the flatness is related to medication, depression that hasn't fully lifted or something else.
If someone offers you a break and you still feel flat afterward, mention that. What changes with sleep or support is useful information. It doesn't settle the diagnosis on its own. Burnout and postpartum depression can overlap.
How do I explain feeling numb to someone?
You don't need a better word than “flat.” Start with what you're noticing and how long it's been happening:
“I'm not crying, but I've felt flat most days for about three weeks. Things I used to enjoy don't do much for me.”
You can say that to your OB, midwife, primary care doctor or a therapist. If making the appointment feels like too much, ask someone you trust to sit with you while you call or help you find a clinician.
A partner may miss what's happening because the practical things are still getting done. Try: “I'm getting through the day, but I don't feel like myself. I'd like help finding someone to talk to.”
What can help while I'm getting support?
Make room for a few small things that used to matter to you: a short walk, a familiar song, time with a friend. There is no requirement to enjoy them on cue. In therapy, an approach called behavioral activation uses manageable activities as part of treating depression.
You can also jot down what you've noticed: mood, sleep, interest in things, and when this started. Keep it simple enough that it doesn't become another assignment. A few notes can help at an appointment; you don't need weeks of tracking before you reach out.
Ask for practical relief too. Someone else handling dinner or taking the baby for a while may give you more room to care for yourself. That support matters whether the cause is depression, exhaustion or a combination.
When should I get help?
Talk to a professional if you've felt numb, empty or uninterested most of the day, nearly every day, for two weeks or more. Reach out sooner if it's severe, worsening or making it hard to care for yourself or your baby. Hopelessness, persistent guilt, trouble sleeping when you have the chance, or feeling detached from yourself also deserve attention.
If you're thinking about suicide or need crisis support, call or text 988. If you or your baby is in immediate danger, call 911. Confusion, unusual beliefs, or seeing or hearing things others don't can be signs of postpartum psychosis and need emergency care: call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room.
For non-emergency support, call or text the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-852-6262, available 24/7, or the Postpartum Support International HelpLine at 1-800-944-4773, where a volunteer will get back to you.
Perinatal depression is treatable. A first appointment can help you understand what you're experiencing and what support fits; you don't have to arrive certain it's depression.
If you'd like to talk about what you've been noticing, you can book a free 15-minute consultation. I see moms in person in Austin and online across Texas and 40+ PSYPACT states.
Sources
- National Institute of Mental Health. Depression. NIH Publication No. 24-MH-8079, revised 2024.
- National Institute of Mental Health. Perinatal Depression. Revised 2023.
- U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, National Center for PTSD. PTSD Basics.
- Goodwin GM, Price J, De Bodinat C, Laredo J. Emotional blunting with antidepressant treatments: A survey among depressed patients. Journal of Affective Disorders, 2017.
- Alsayednasser B, et al. How well do Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and Behavioural Activation for depression repair anhedonia? A secondary analysis of the COBRA randomized controlled trial. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 2022.
- 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. What to Expect.
- Postpartum Support International. Perinatal Mental Health: Signs, Symptoms and Treatment and Get Help.
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Frequently asked questions
- Is feeling numb a sign of postpartum depression?
- It can be. Depression can include a loss of interest or pleasure as well as a low or empty mood. Numbness also has other possible contributors, so tell a clinician what it feels like and how long it's been happening.
- Can postpartum depression feel like numbness instead of sadness?
- Yes. Sadness doesn't have to be the feeling you notice most. Feeling flat, disconnected or unable to enjoy things deserves an assessment, especially when it lasts most days for two weeks or more or feels severe sooner.
- Why don't I feel anything after having a baby?
- Sleep loss, burnout, a frightening birth, depression and some medications can contribute to flatness. More than one may be involved. A clinician can help you work out the possibilities; don't stop or change medication without talking to your prescriber.
- How long does postpartum numbness last?
- There isn't a fixed timeline because the cause matters. Don't wait for it to resolve before telling someone, particularly if it's persistent or affecting daily life. If you're already receiving treatment and still feel flat, bring that up too.
- When is feeling numb postpartum an emergency?
- For suicidal thoughts or crisis support, call or text 988; call 911 if you or your baby is in immediate danger. Confusion, unusual beliefs or seeing or hearing things others don't need emergency care through 911 or the nearest ER. For non-emergency support, the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-852-6262 is available by call or text 24/7.
Dr. Jana Rundle
Licensed Psychologist, PsyD, PMH-C
