Why “enjoy every moment” makes the hard moments feel like failure

Transcript

The thing that I hate most that people tell new moms is this idea to enjoy every moment. It goes by so fast, enjoy it. But when we hear that as new moms, it suddenly feels like in those hard moments that we're doing something wrong because like, shouldn't we be enjoying this? But here's what I've learned as a licensed psychologist who specializes in moms, some moments are so beautiful in motherhood. And some moments just really aren't. They're overstimulating, they're exhausting, they're really, really hard. And both can exist at the same time. You can love your baby, but not enjoy the baby season. That does not mean that you're a bad mom. It's actually the reality of being human in something really intense. So if you are not enjoying every moment of the season that you find yourself in, you are still a good mom. I think when we can acknowledge that hard things are hard and we don't have to smile our way through them, that it actually opens up a path where we can appreciate where we are while also moving forward.